My Slow Way of Killing Myself

Today has been completely unremarkable.
So I thought I would share with you my new fitness thing that I'm trying.

Basically, I trying to do a lot of toning exercises because I don't want to be skinny (what would I do without boobs?). But I would like to tone and get a bit fitter- I'm trying to remain realistic, I'm not a sporty person and I'm never going to look like a model, but there are places that just don't need to wobble the way they do.
So every other day I'm trying to do this:

L and R mean left and right, and F means forward. So when I do left and right crunches I'm doing to side muscles of my stomach and the forward do the ones right on the front.

Butt lifts are where you lie on the floor and crotch thrust yourself to the sky.

Tail lifts (I think the proper name is a reverse crunch) is where you lie on your back bring your legs up 90 degrees from the floor and 'lift' your butt up, by bringing your knees into your chest, it does the bottom part of your stomach. 

Bicycle crunches were made by the Devil, these are where you lift your legs 90 degrees from the floor, put your fingertips behind your ears, go into a crunch and then bring your elbows forward to meet your opposite knee. So Right elbow to left knee, but you maintain the crunch the hole time, you just sort of swing from side to side. They are painful! But I could only do 40 of them 5 days ago now with a little break in between (for a burst of cardio) I can do another 40.

In case you don't now, burpees are where you put your hands on the floor (into a crouch), kick your legs out behind you (so you're in a press up position) then jump your legs back into the crouch, then jump up to a standing position, and repeat- I hate these.

Now the cardio. I don't have a treadmill and the very thought of running in public makes my all squiffy. So I do skipping on the spot (no rope just literally jumping up off the ground a few inches and making the arm motions). It sounds stupid yes, but try it, you will be breathing hard after a minute or two.

The other thing I do to really ramp up the heart rate is butt kicks. It's jogging on the spot but you kick your feet really high behind you and- kick yourself in the butt. Again it sounds silly but it really gets your sweating and your heart pounding and that's what I'm going for. 

A lot of these exercises I picked up from the Jillian Micheals 30 Day Shred. 

You like the way it looks like her crotch is glowing?

Which I'm doing on the days I'm not doing the written exercises. It. Is. HARD. Ok? It is really hard, but it's fantastic, it's circuit training and each circuit lasts six minutes. 

A circuit is made up of:

• 3 minutes strength (press ups, lunches, squats) but she combines that with other things, so you'll go into a squat but you'll be throwing punches as well, to work out your whole body.
• 2 minutes of cardio (jumping jacks, skipping, butt kicks)
• 1 minute of abs (crunches, side crunches, tail lifts, bicycle crunches)

And each 6 minute minute set is comprised of different strength, cardio and abs workouts, the total workout lasts 30 minutes with warm up and cool down. You do each workout for 30 seconds, which is why I love this. If you really struggle with one of the exercises, you're only doing for 30 seconds.

I am so lazy it's silly, but even I can find 30 minutes in my day to do this, I won't believe anyone that says they can't.  

So, the other thing I was going to briefly mention today, is why I decided to start this thing. 

I was fed up with making excuses, I've never been happy with the way I look and I've been meaning to start a blog for ages, originally it was going to be a beauty blog (with the amount of beauty crap I own, I figure I should use it for something), and I'm planning on including some of that later on.

But yes, I was making excuses for why I couldn't exercise, or go on a diet, and I'm the kind of person that if I don't tell anyone that I'm going on a diet- I will cheat and it won't matter because no one will be any the wiser.

But this way, I've told everyone, I'm putting it out here and holding myself accountable for making changes in my own life, rather than keep hoping they just happen.

Blah blah blah, meaningful bullshit goes here. I'll leave you now.

03/08 Calories- 705.

04/08 Calories- 722.